I am a child of Television

A story my father used to tell about me was that he was in the beginning of waking up on a Saturday and he had this feeling of unease. He said he felt like someone was watching him. And I was. In my little feeted (footed) jammies, I stood near my father's face and he said you could only see my little nose & two big eyes. He knew what I wanted. I never bugged him, I just stood there until he woke up. He would get me my Cheerios and turn on the TV. He went back to bed.

My brother is 2 years younger than I am. He and I trained ourselves to climb the cabinets to get our bowls & situate ourselves with our cereal in front of the tv. Apparently truth be told, my mother was not a morning person. I recall throughout my school years, I would get up...open my mom's door, and let the dog in to sleep with her. Mom would unconciously lift the covers to let the aging dog under the sheets so the two of them could continue sleeping.

Apparently once in a fit of guilt, my mother started getting up with my brother and I to get us ready for school. After a few days, we voted and per my mother...asked her not to do this anymore. With this newfound independence came responsibility. We would have to be ready to go as the third cartoon on Ramblin Rod was on. (In Chicago it was Bozo the Clown, who I apparently met & CRIED when he shook my hand. Wuss!) Every city had a Ramblin Rod show. We could probably plot the decline of children as we know it by the disappearance of those quaint little morning shows. Rod I am sure was a good man, but quite unaware of the importance he played in our morning rituals. Before Popeye (Yes I am that old) had started, we had to be leaving for the bus, with or without toast in our mouths.

The same could be told about bedtime, but unfortunately I can't remember the shows. For the LONGEST time my bed time was 8pm. JESUS CHRIST...who could I survive without seeing ANYTHING. Then by the grace of the television gawd, it was moved to 8.30 (Note....Rick's stayed at 8pm. Don't know HOW my mom survived the tormenture!). But 8.30 sucked as most of the shows were AN HOUR and I had to go to the bed in the middle of them. GOOD GAWD! I will say that my mother saw through the pretend sleeping in front of the tv to make it to 9...bitch!

Tonight I am watching the Emmys...well, have been since the PRE red carpet crap started. But it brings back memories of being a kid. My mom would pull us out of bed to watch special shows so we could "learn". I mean in college as we watch the Emmys and did shots with each ugly dress, I was the ONLY one who knew who Red Buttons was and could qualify that he was looking old! Didn't EVERY parent make their kids watch Hatari! on Saturdays? My mom remembered distinctly pulling us out of bed to watch a Ed Sullivan anniversary show. I am the only person I know of who has SEEN Topo Gigio perform on TV and was once mesmerized by the spinning plate dude. S'allright? S'allright!

I still cry through the posthumus recognition of those who have passed. My husband, sister and I still alert each other when the older actors pass on. I just got weepy now when Don Rickles SHAMED every comic in the building with his genius during his acceptance speech. I am a child of television and am an adult of television as well now.

I learned all I know about funny from tv. My mom (again) would commandere the tv for her British Comedy Nights. Her laugh could be heard throughout our neighborhood on summer nights! I learned about funny from those comedies, Monty Python, Carol Burnett, The Smother's Brothers and Laugh in. Even now when people struggle with true British accents, to me it is second nature. I do know who Morgle the friendly droud is. Can be impressed with the erudition of Tommy Smother's stupidity. And cried for HOURS when Harvey Korman died because one of the best moments in my life spent with my mom was watching Tim Conway and Harvey Korman be Sleeping Beauty and Prince Charming in a close up with HUGE fake boobs. I know my mom and I almost died for laughing...and how great that was!

Now I am addicted to my DVR. This afternoon (Football Sunday upstairs, DVR catch up downstairs) I watched my shows Eureka, Burn Notice, The Closer (what will I do on Mondays until January!), History Detectives, Antiques Roadshow, several Food Network shows (Michael Symon & food...why have PORN??), and then Jon and Kate plus 8...sigh! Life is great!

My mornings now are regimented by dogs peeing and NPR. Times have changed. The other morning on vacation I looked through the local Utah channels and there were NO Ramblin Rod's...apparently Utah mornings are fraught with the anxiety over muffins and tasty wraps for kids lunches. The saving grace is PBS (gawd bless PBS!)and their array of morningness for kids! Thank goodness they are there...how else would someone know when they needed to be out for the bus!

Be good to you!
H