Are you there God, its me...Heather!

Last year I went to see Dolores the psychic. Mock, applaud or be disgusted....it is no matter. She freaked me out. During my session, she said "I see you sitting on the toilet yelling 'Jesus Christ can I just go to the bathroom alone??!!'".

Again, I am an over thinker. Many things disturbed me out about that observation (what do you call a psychic vision?). Dude, I wanted to look back at her and say "Jesus Christ can I just go to the bathroom alone?", because apparently NOW I had to worry about fucking psychics attending "the event".

The primary shock was that she was exactly right. Many times as I sit at home, there is a little white paw attached to a spotted forearm reaching under the door to urge me to hurry, next to that there is a larger shadow sitting right next to the door whining at my re-appearance. Finally there are times when there is a knock and "Are you gonna be in there long?". Again "Jesus Christ can I just go to the bathroom alone?". I can understand why that vision stood out to Dolores.

This leads me to work. I am a fairly well known personality (most assuredly) in our center. Everywhere I go is a stage for Heather. Many times there is little chance of privacy for me regardless where I am.

Honestly, being in the bathroom is sometimes the only time alone I get during a day. Forget going to church on Sundays, my pontificating is done a la John. More often than not, I get situated and take advantantage of the peace to just talk to God, or god depending on my holiness of the day.

I remember the day I noticed that that I did settle in, sigh, and call on the Father. "Dear God, please let me meet xx deadline". "Dear God, please let (marital strief) come out ok". "Dear God, please let me NOT see xx today". I figured if I partook of this spirituality moment in a far back stall, I was enabled to commune more peacefully. After I accepted my predilictation for potty praying, it became liberating. I began to be more thoughtful about my conversations and pontifications as the days progressed. Can't say whether it helped or not...I still ran into the people I didn't want to see, I still had marital strief and I didn't get the job I spent a few IBS weeks worth of time cajolling "the big guy" into seeing my way of thinking. But I felt comfortable with my liberated sense idea of God and I.

It is not as easy to commune with my maker at home. There are times when the little white dog sneaks in and sits next to me in her makeshift bed and the "right moment" just disappears. Not that I believe she can understand my prayers or thoughts, but you know....God is something I do alone. I make due with what ever snippets of private time God can give me or I can give God.

In the end, the flush becomes less of a closing of the conversation and more so of an AHHHHMEN.

Be good to you!
H