I am a frustrated comic. My job as a corporate trainer fulfilled that need of mine as I had a captive audience who didn't have to pay $9 for a watered down bad drink to listen to me....and they laughed. Alot.
I am a burgeoning writer. This is feeding that need. BUT for several years I have been playing with titles of either short stories or books I would write. It became a hobby. Years ago I found a precious book entitled "At the Sign of the Naked Waiter". I bought it for the title alone. It is still on my bookshelf. But I have seen many titles which were created for that shock purpose or to cause the potential reader to look twice and when we did, we realized it was really dumb.
The other day, the littlest of my doglets jumped onto me as a morning greeting (much to my husband's joy) and immediately licked my face. At one point I croaked from under my covers: "I don't need your tongue in my mouth please". So another potential title was added to my list. I mean I really don't need my Daisy's tongue in my mouth, I was polite. But it seems to be an indicator of my life lately....dogs dogs dogs and everywhere dogs!
My first title was "How in the Hell do you Drive a Buick". I thought of that one with a thwarted short story using the type of car you drive as a metaphor for the place you are in your life. At that point, I had a 4-door gray sedan (huge mistake...boyfriend said it looked like a getaway car!). I also was looking forward in mylife to a time where I would have a Buick and be in my "Buick" stage of my life and it being so unfamiliar to me so much so that I am incable of driving it. Deep I know but being 22 and imagining you will one day HAVE TO DRIVE A BUICK was pretty scary...not daunting but scary.
SO....list what an outrageous title for your life's story would be. I once had a list of these preposterous eye grabbers and regret "re-organizing" them out of my life!
Be good to you!
H
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2 comments:
GREAT post.
Okay, I am clumsy. It's gotten better over the years, but as a youth, I tripped and fell regularly. I grew up in a large, very old house with narrow, narrow rickety stairs and well, that didn't help.
One day I remember taking a slip and tumble on the stairs while running to get the phone in the hallway. I actually answered (in full on dive) and talked like a normal person.
So, the book title of my life:
"If I Fall Down The Stairs I Can Still Answer The Phone."
Another:
"My Oily Skin Has Paid Off"
Well if I think of my last relationship and were I to write a book about it - it would have been titled, "Stop moving your lips!" Now for my life....that's a good one. I am pretty sure I would title it, "What the fuck was God thinking".
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